Essays

The Eggshell Waltz


By Ron Ambes

Words fail me.....when I feel like this,

fallen with such intensity.... into I know not what.

Pressed full-force, from the inside out,

to meet the one you are.

The I that I am

moving with forceful osmotic pressure

through the membrane

that has separated my heart

from yours.......... for so long.

Incarnating...maybe for the first time,

completely, here, now.

No other way to know you fully

got to come all the way in.

into this body, into this world,

into the pain of being fully human,

fully divine.

This multi-dimensional creature I am,

howling with wild primal longing

to touch and be touched

from and at the core

To know you,

to open to the pain of encountering

that which seems to be.... not me!

All my life,

I've been dancing the avoid-dance;

the eggshell waltz.

So I hardly know the steps

to dance with you - to let you in.

The impulse to dance with you

is the profoundest mystery,

dismantling all my mis-understanding

and taking me to the root...

To the recognition

of the terror

at the meeting place

of self and other

©Ron Ambes 8/9/03

 

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