Essays
Welcome

Sugandhi Katharine Barnes

Welcome

Sugandhi134.jpgI live about five miles from a town of 1,000 people in a valley in central Washington. I am surrounded by mountains, inspired by the vast ever-changing sky and deeply nourished by the presence of silence. I am an artist and painter, which I love and which helps me discover hidden parts of myself that arise in the creative process. I am deeply grateful for the Trillium path, which has transformed and continues to transform my life. It has given me a context and language within which I am becoming all my authentic self, deeply embodied while continually resting in Being (Consciousness).

As a child, I experienced spontaneous shifts from everyday reality into the realms of infinite Consciousness. These experiences raised questions that resulted in a lifetime of seeking for the Truth about God and who or what I am. When I discovered Waking Down in Mutuality I had already done years of work on myself through therapy and other modalities. At the time, I was practicing yoga and meditation and following an eastern based spiritual path. After attending my first sitting, I was particularly skeptical and resistant to learning yet another system for awakening. That evening, I felt the teacher's transmission profoundly but I couldn't see the benefit of sharing. How ironic that mutuality would prove to be a key to my awakening. Over time I came to realize how vitally important it is for me to be seen, heard and held without judgment while speaking my truth. I went to as many sittings, workshops and retreats as I could and soaked up a lot of transmission on the way to my second birth on December 11, 2011.

Awakening is a process. We all experience it uniquely, moving at our own pace and coming to it from different angles. My awakening was initially transcendent and impersonal. I fell into a space of luscious emptiness and experienced Onlyness - myself as everything. This was followed some months later by a second awakening when I fell dramatically into my heart. Since then I am relaxing more and more into my body as my awakening continues to deepen, as various patterns and pieces arise to be seen and felt and integrated into the whole. I am grateful to the Trillium community for giving me support in this ongoing process of discovery. I feel liberated from seeking and relief from my long held beliefs that I am not good enough, that there is something wrong with me, or that I need improvement. I have finally come home to myself after a lifetime of being away. I feel my purpose is to be fully present here and experience everything - all the juiciness and lusciousness as well as, and maybe especially, the heartache - to courageously and authentically live from the core paradox - being grounded in the wellbeing of Infinite Consciousness while at the same time being rooted in humanity, allowing all of myself with love and compassion for the difficulty of being here in this limited, poignant, vitally alive embodied life.

I would love to be a part of your journey home to your True Self. I am stepping up, ready to be here for you, to support you by listening deeply, holding you with compassion and love in your unique awakening process.

If you feel you want to work with me, let's set up a time to see if we are a good fit.

katbar749@gmail.com